Being an Adult = Doing Hard Things You Don’t Want to Do

“Maybe true love is a decision. You know, a decision to take a chance with somebody, to give to somebody without worrying whether they’ll give anything back, or if they’re gonna hurt you, or if they really are the one. Maybe love isn’t something that happens to you. Maybe it’s something you have to choose.”

So, I thought I had figured out the problem and the solution and that once I got back up to school, I’d have everything fixed up just the way I wanted them to be. I mean I’m great and awesome, sassy, fun, and…..strong willed. I was thinking about that quote for several days. Love is a decision, a choice. And sometimes when we love someone, we have to do things that are good for them but hurt us. Sometimes we make a decision to stop fighting, sometimes we make the decision to walk away, sometimes we make the decision to be patient, and sometimes we have to make the decision to stop loving them because that is the only way for them to become who they’re meant to be.

I’m guessing that is not romantic, it is not sweet, and it is possibly one of the most depressing things you’ve ever had the misfortune to read. It probably sounds like I’m giving up on love, wrong. I’m just choosing to love in a different way I suppose. I can’t have what I want. It won’t work. And so I’m going to try to fix my perspective. I’m going to strive to be of good cheer. “Cheerfulness in the scriptural context connotes a divinely assured optimism, “a deep trust in God’s unfolding purposes,” a grounded conviction that God will always keep His promises.” (Camille Fronk Olson, Ensign July 2011)

Sometimes being an adult means doing hard things that we don’t want to do. Sometimes we have to make ourselves put the well being of others before our own wants. Sometimes we have to let go of the storybook ending we have imagined, that doesn’t mean we’ve given up on anything though. It just means we’re growing up.


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